Just Me

2009-01-30T19:22:00.004Z

here we go again, gonna try and blog every so often.
this will probably just become a record of the stresses and strains of the rest of my honours year.
Yeah so, honours year,
its horrible sometimes, as much fun as the social side of uni is, the amount of work is actually insane. so ive got my first submission of my honours project in a fortnight... its not gonna be a fun few weeks. but anythings worth a shot.

LJx

2008-03-13T18:04:00.000Z

ever feel completely and utterly aimless?

Songs

2008-02-25T23:44:00.002Z

As you may know, I would not survive without music.
Currently 2 songs by Relient K have been running though my head non-stop, so I thought i's share them with you.

Over thinking click here for video

i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to analayze
look in my eyes
cause you're my dream please come true

i was thinking
over thinking
about exactly how i'm not exactly him
i'll break my heart in two
more times than you could ever do
cause you're my dream please come true

cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind

i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl

i was sinking
lower, sinking
cause i lost the things i held on to
they let me think a thought
a thought that i would know was not
of seeing my dream come true

i was thinking
over thinking
about how far i had let this go
one more guy/girl chiché
i know now you're just in the way
of me and my dream come true

cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i'm trying to make sense
out of all of this
while your fading scent
just slips through my grip

i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl

don't touch the positive with the negative end
don't touch the positive with the negative end
cause after all of the sparks you're still alone in the dark
cause after all of the sparks you're left alone in the dark

and while i'm able, i think i'll label
experience with you as a mistake
and while i'm at it, i'll say i've had it
experience with you is a mistake

cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i'm trying to make sense
out of all of this
while your fading scent
just slips through my grip

i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to think about
to figure out
if you're my dream please come true

Which to bury, us or the Hatchet click here for video

I think you know what I'm getting at
I find it so upsetting that
the memories that you select you keep the bad but the good you just forget

and even though I'm angry I can still say
I know my heart will break the day
when you peel out and drive away
I can't believe this happened

And all this time I never thought
that all we had would be all for naught

No, I don't hate you
don't want to fight you
know I'll always love you
but right now I just don't like you
No, I don't hate you
don't want to fight you
know I'll always love you
but right now I just don't like you
cause you took this too far

Make your decision and don't you dare think twice
go with your instincts along with some bad advice
this didn't turn out the way I thought it would at all
you blame me but some of this is still your fault

I tried to move you, but you just wouldn't budge
I tried to hold your hand but you'd rather hold your grudge
I think you know what I'm getting at
you said goodbye and I just don't want you regretting that

and wisdom always chooses
these black eyes and these bruises
over the heartache that they say
never completely goes away
(I just can't believe this happened
and one day we'll see this come around)

what happened to us
i heard that it's me we should blame
what happened to us
why didn't you stop me from turning out this way
and know that I don't hate you
and know that I don't want to fight you
and know that I'll always love you
but right now I just don't...

Lent

2008-02-18T23:34:00.003Z

Yeah so i realised that i said that i'd write up about what ive done when it comes to my lenten discipline (as my dad calls it) and i havent. sorry.
Ive found it alot harder than i thought. so i decided that i was gonna give time, not necessarily an hour everyday, some more some less. and over the past fortnight (roughly) ive kept doing this as much as i can.
I've :
tidied up about the house, made cups of tea without being asked (more difficult than realised), cleaned the kitchen (i mean really cleaned), helped mates with some things, and loads of other little things.
Intentionally ive not told everyone why ive been doing these things. cause im not gonna stop when it comes to easter. i think helping out, when i see that there is something that needs doing, is something that everyone should do, i know that in this day and age its alot harder to stop in the street and ask someone if they need a help, but as ive found, people are glad that you even ask.
Ive gotten alot more out of this that i thought i would, here goes another 4 weeks :P

Colour Quiz

2008-02-08T16:59:00.000Z

Generated on Fri Feb 8 09:00:17 2008.
Laura's Existing Situation
Seeks to express the need for identification in a sensitive and intimate atmosphere where esthetic or emotional delicacy can be protected and nurtured.

Laura's Stress Sources
Wants to overcome a feeling of emptiness and of separation from others. Believes that life still has far more to offer and that she may miss her share of experiences if she fails to make the best use of every opportunity. She therefore pursues her objectives with a fierce intensity and commits herself deeply and readily. Feels herself to be completely competent in any field in which she engages, and can sometimes be considered by others to be interfering or meddlesome.

Laura's Restrained Characteristics
Feels that she is burdened with more than her fair share of problems. However, she sticks to her goals and tries to overcome her difficulties by being flexible and accommodating.
Feels that she cannot do much about her existing problems and difficulties and that she must make the best of things as they are.

Laura's Desired Objective
Strives for a life rich in activity and experience, and for a close bond offering emotional fulfillment.

Laura's Actual Problem
The fear that she might be prevented from achieving the things she wants leads her to play her part with an urgent and hectic intensity.

Laura's Actual Problem #2
Fights against restriction or limitation, and insists on developing freely as a result of her own efforts.

Lent

2008-02-06T12:04:00.000Z

This year for lent I have decided to give up an hour of my time everyday.
My aim is to give an hour a day to someone else, so during the hour i will try to do somethings to help someone else, however small the task, no gain for me at all. I'm sure i'll get through a week, then i wont have a clue what to do. So after a week or so, i will need to go out of my way to help.
This is gonna be a challenge for me, not that i dont help where i can, but that ive just started term 2 of my 3rd (and final possibly) year of uni, and i will have alot of work to do.
I'm going to 'log' how lent goes on here, and we'll see how it goes.
I have one minor bit of 'leway', if i miss a day, the hour will be caught up on later in the weeek, as mondays for me are jam-packed at uni.

Here goes nothing.

January Gathering

2008-01-25T21:16:00.000Z

Spread the word, feel free to use the flyer.

This thing I know

2008-01-23T21:58:00.000Z

Somehow I’ve lost that unquestioning faith in You
Somehow I hear doubts all about You
But one thing I know; Jesus I love You
This one thing I know; Jesus I love You

And now I miss the child-like faith I had
My adult mind always complicating You
But one thing I know; Jesus I love You
This one thing I know; Jesus I love You

Strip away all that hinders me
Restore my hope,
Bring me back to that place
Where I simply believed
Jesus I love You
Jesus I need You
Jesus I trust You
Jesus I love You

Emma Pears
©2004 ALOVE

Coursework

2008-01-11T13:58:00.000Z

I forgot how much i enjoyed programming, and how much it annoyed me at the same time!
I've spent the week attempting to program a chat server and client. Basically MSN.
Wow is it hard.
But thats it done, my last piece of coursework finished and handed in.... i dunno what to do now!

maybe some random programming....hmmm

2008-01-10T09:27:00.000Z

This is a video, of a dramatisation of the song 'Everything' by Lifehouse.
It was just too good not to put on here.

Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
You're everything,everything
You're all I want your all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

2007 is no more - roll on 2008

2008-01-02T21:26:00.000Z

So thats 2007 over and done with.
Its scary to think thats it done, and we're now into 2008, which has been dubbed the year of change by myself, and my sister. This year holds alot of changes in our lives.
Bethany goes to uni, moves out of the house and into halls of residence....wherever she ends up going, whether its Glasgow, or Belfast, or anywhere inbetween.
Me...I dunno where i'll be, I could end up graduating this year, or i could be going on to do another year of uni, and getting my honours degree. Whatever i end up doing I'm gonna have to move out anyway, Which is a pretty scary thought for me. With my parents whereever they're gonna be moved to, which could be anywhere... and i mean anywhere. And My big sister in Prague, this year is gonna be scary, but i think it'll be a good kind of scary.
I think Christmas is gonna have a very different feel to it, whereever i'm gonna be, cause it'll probably be the first time that the whole family is together since everyone going in their own directions.
So yeah, this next year is gonna be extremely different compared to the past 10. (well 20 really).

Word for 2008 - Survival (eek)

New Year - New Blog

2008-01-02T21:22:00.000Z

Happy New Year

Its a new year, so i thought i'd refresh my blog.

Blogging - in general

2007-11-21T15:33:00.000Z

Everytime I'm just randomly browsing, I log in to blogger.. and I really wanna blog ..something..anything, but i can never think of anything to blog about...
Wish I did... i think I've got Bloggers Block :P
it sucks

Cafe Church

2007-09-27T09:19:00.000Z

So late in blogging this!

Well, a while ago I was chatting to my Dad about ways we could 'inject' life into the Corps.

Its too often that we get stuck into old routines, and the worship is a routine, it shouldn't be like that. We should be excited to be going to the church, worship should be an exciting thing. And if worship begins to be routine, the excitement would begin to wear off.

One of the things that I suggested was the idea of changing the style of the evening meeting to a sort of 'Cafe Church'. It took some explaining of the basic concepts, and how it could be done, but we tried it a few weeks ago on the September weekend.

Seeing as 'cafe church' is still an experimental idea, there are no set guidelines or anything to help along anyone wanting to try this out. So it took me and my parents sitting down talking through how we were going to do it. 'Cafe Church' is a extremely relaxed form of worship, and is a really worthwhile challenge.

We rearranged the hall to resemble a cafe, as you would expect. We brought down the tables and arranged the chairs round them. doing away with the usual 'pew' arrangement. With a table at the back with tea, coffee, and juice, and biscuits etc readily available. So it was a big change from the usual Sunday evening worship. No Band, No Songsters, just a piano, a guitar, and a CD player when necessary.

The 'Cafe Church' went down really well with the people that were there. When they began to arrive, looking at the people that came, I was a bit worried that it might be a bit too different for the congregation. I was pleasantly surprised.

So there we are, injecting a bit of life into the corps, worship is becoming exciting again.
The next 'cafe church' is going to be a week on Sunday.
I'll let you know how it goes, and I'll post some pictures of the night aswell.

Summer

2007-09-14T22:03:00.000Z

Summer is almost over for me now, 4 months of no uni coming to an end!
I must sound pathetic, but I can't wait to get back to uni.

So... what have i done all summer?

Well...

I went away with my mates from uni to a place near callander (in the middle of nowhere in scotland - perfect!). It was a fantastic week. Don't think it could have been much better. Even the bad parts of it were good, if that makes any sense.

as a family we went to London (cause i had booked tickets for us to see Wicked - which is fantastic...anyone would like it! )

I made some new friends in London aswell

We went to a place called Howletts Wildlife Park, in Canterbury.
In there all the animals are endangered and it is basically the only place that you are likely to see them up close. It was amazing, sitting eating pizza with a elephant yards away, and walking round with lemurs jumping about all round you. It was fantastic, and if i could i'd go again in a second.

Apart from holidays, i have drank lots of coffee/frapps/ hot chocolate when meeting up with friends old and new while discussing the matters of the day. Being my eventual plans for dedicated cafe church thingmy, or whats going on in the world and how it can be sorted.

I've spent the majority of my time in my house to learning more songs on the guitar,
the most recent of which being "more than words" as performed by extreme. Its a fantastic song.

Also lots of time this summer has been spent being a listening ear for friends who needed it. Which i'm happy to do, I happily put all my troubles aside and help out friends, even if all I wanted to do was talk to someone about what was going on in my life.
Sometimes i wonder who would catch me if i fall... I'm there to catch any of my friends if they fall. I know my friends would all say they would catch me, but whether they would actually catch me is the question.

Anyway, Uni starts back on Monday, and i'll try to blog as much as i can.

2007-09-14T22:01:00.001Z

I havent blogged in ages...
and I have no excuse...
i will try to be a better blogger.
LJxx

i cant wait

2007-08-14T19:13:00.000Z

I cant believe this, its such a good thing, it will hopefully get kids into watching this show, and then maybe getting interested in learning about the bible. (its a dream, how much it will come true...is yet to be seen)

Colour Quiz

2007-08-06T15:15:00.000Z

Frighteningly Accurate
http://www.ColorQuiz.com/

Your Existing Situation

Insecure. Seeks roots, stability, emotional security, and an environment
providing greater ease and fewer problems.

Your Stress Sources

Seeks independence and freedom from any restriction and therefore avoids
obligations or anything which might prove hampering. She is being subjected to
considerable pressure and wants to escape from it so that she can obtain what
she needs, but tends to lack the necessary strength of purpose to succeed in
this.

Your Restrained Characteristics

Circumstances are such that she feels forced to compromise for the time being if
she is to avoid being cut off from affection or from full
participation.

Remains emotionally unattached even when involved in a close
relationship.

Your Desired Objective

Preoccupied with things of an intensely exciting nature, whether erotically
stimulating or otherwise. Wants to be regarded as an exciting and interesting
personality with an altogether charming and impressive influence on others. Uses
tactics skillfully so as to avoid endangering her chances of success or
undermining others' confidence in herself.

Your Actual Problem

The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond
her capabilities, or her reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety
and a sense of personal (but unadmitted) inadequacy. She attempts to remedy this
by intense activity and by insistence on getting her own way. Faulty
self-control can lead to ungovernable displays of anger.

Your Actual Problem #2

Fights against restriction or limitation, and insists on developing freely as a
result of her own efforts.

Lack of blogging

2007-08-04T21:02:00.000Z

I know its been ages since i last blogged, and to be honest the only excuse is that i havent been bothered, and i havent felt like theres been anything to blog about.
But thats just making excuses cause there have been many things over the past month..or more that i could blog about, so heres a quick run down. (I will dedicate a single blog to some of them later on)

# holiday with my friends from uni - middle of nowhere in Scotland
Got to know my friends that bit better, and had many a early morning chat that made me smile.
I loved it, it came just at the right moment, it gave me a chance to get away from...everything and just relax without feeling like i had the world on my shoulders.
But i need another one now.

# holiday with my family - London
Saw Harry Potter in the Odeon in Leciester Sq.
Saw Wicked - one word - Wow - another few words - im going to see it again whether i can afford it or not.
Chane to just have fun with my Mum, Dad and wee sis outside of the usual setting, got on with them waaay better than usual.

# coffee with Laura and Headphonaught
Whether they know it or not, I needed to get away from my house for a while, and they gave me an invite just at the right time. (Thanx)

# Festivals for music school
(more to come on this)

I will try to be a better blogger in future

2007-06-21T22:34:00.000Z

Bethany (my wee sis) wrote a beautiful piece of music for her higher music composition. She performed it at the school prizegiving tonight, so i thought i'd share it with you.

World Premiere - "The Journey Home" By Bethany Logan

Wooh Well Done *applause*
(not a proud big sister at all)

Tagged : Again

2007-06-15T12:08:00.000Z

Alistair tagged me. Here's the rules:
Grab the book closest to you. Turn to page 161. Print the 5th complete sentence on your blog. Tag 5 others.

Ok so closest book is...a music book, but i didnt think that counted. So the second closest book is "The Origins of Tolkiens Middle-Earth for Dummies" (a random buy to add to my collection)
The 5th complete sentence is..

***************
"When he refused her the Simarils, which retained the last of the light from the two trees,

Ungoliant tried to strangle him in her webs."

***************

Everyone that i would tag has already been tagged. So i guess the chain stops here.

e-mail

2007-06-12T16:56:00.000Z

When I checked my e-mails this morning, I saw that a friend had e-mailed a set of lyrics to me, and had highlighted certain passages.
As some of you may know, theres alot of stuff that is on my mind at the moment, and decisions that i have to make. This e-mail is just what i needed.
Thanks

This is what was highlighted.
(From Steven Curtis Chapman - I will be here)

I will be here
When you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen
And I will be here
When the laughter turns to cryin'
Through the winning, losing and trying

Tomorrow morning, if you wake up
And the future is unclear
I will be here

Sometimes a little bit of friendship can go a long way.

Youth Chorus

2007-06-08T09:43:00.000Z

On tuesday night, there was a youth chorus practice, (as usual on the first tuesday of the month) and David did the devotions.
He used a song by Matt Redman called When all is said and done (i think). While the song was playing one line of the song stuck in my head..and after that happened i didnt really listen to the rest of the song.
The line that got suck was "I can't do this all by myself" ... thinking about going to do essential and things like that..this makes sense, i cant rely only on myself to get through the next few months never mind years. I've got to have help and support and rely on friends and family aswell as God to get through.
I've actually just realised what song is being played just now...its Storyside B - You're not alone. Coincidence? "you're not alone, if you just stop and look around you'll see you're not the only one"

Anyway, the youth chorus (me included) are off to the Gospel Arts Concert in the Albert Hall for the weekend. So I wont be blogging till Sunday..maybe Monday if i fall asleep.

More to this life

2007-06-08T09:40:00.000Z

This is a song by a band called storyside b, who are currently one of my favorite bands. This song for some unknown reason has been stuck in my head since saturday...heres the lyrics.

Round and round this world we go
Forming truths from what we know
It could never be foretold
What will happen tomorrow
Things we see right now will change
Our lives will never be the same
Praying hallowed be thy name
And I am lifted from my shame
And I know this will not be in vain

A moment in time has passed before my eyes
There's more to this life, there's more to this life
I'm struggling to fight the reasons we cry
There's more to this life, there's more to this life

Time will tell as hours go
The truth inside will soon unfold
Revealing secrets as we grow
Into a brand new tomorrow
The plan is already in place
Transcending love through time and space
Strong and humbled by His grace
Catching tear drops from my face
And I know I will not be ashamed

A moment in time has passed before my eyes
There's more to this life, there's more to this life
I'm struggling to fight the reasons we cry
There's more to this life, there's more to this life

And if it's peace you seek
Let me wash away the blood that's drawn
And soak up all the tears upon my sleeve
And if you'll kneel with me
Well I will pray for our forgiveness
To the only One who'll truly make us clean

A moment in time has passed before my eyes
There's more to this life, there's more to this life
I'm struggling to fight the reasons we cry
There's more to this life, there's more to this life

My Daemon

2007-06-06T19:29:00.000Z

As I look at you - Andrew Grinnell

2007-06-04T12:42:00.000Z

As I look at you am I satisfied with all I see in me?
Am I living in your intimacy?
Is the faith I have simply make believe or can you see in me
A life that's found in you for eternity?

Do I know you more clearly?
Do I love you more dearly?
Do I follow you more nearly?
Lead me day by day.

Is the God I serve just an image of all I'd think he'd be?
Is my view of you true reality?
Open up my eyes for I want to see the one who died for me.
I want to know your love more completely.

Help me know you more clearly?
Help me love you more dearly?
Help me follow you more nearly?
Lead me day by day.

EnergIIIze

2007-06-02T21:56:00.000Z

So today was the 2nd EnergIIIze, and as these events usually are it was a good day. And as per usual the day of discussing life in general...has made me think.....far too much.

Yeah so...the first seminar i went to was called tent-making and was led by Chick Yuill. This was basically talking about bi-vocational leaders, church leaders who earn their keep by doing another job...being dentist...shop worker...whatever.

The second seminar i went to was about the salvation armys essential programs.
(This was the seminar that really got me thinking cause ive been thinking about doing essential for the past year and...years before that. I think since I went to the alove open day in edinburgh a few years ago.) I kinda was avoiding going to the essential seminar but being the person she is Laura asked me when i was going to it...so i went...knowing that it was the one i should be at.
So Carrie Cummings was leading the seminar and she basically explained the essential program. At the end of the seminar there was the usual question time...and again knowing that i should be talking to her...i didnt. I was still avoiding it.
After this seminar it was the coffee break, and again i saw Carrie sitting there and knew that i should be sitting beside her talking to her..and asking questions about essential. I didnt....but Carrie came and talked to me...she must have known that i was contemplating it or something...but she came over and we talked about well what i was doing with life at the moment, and what i was gonna do after uni, then we got into talking about essential, and i know its what ive gotta do...and i do wanna do it, but im gonna get my degree first...hopefully.

The third seminar i went to was planting. Now this is something that i am interested in and i have ideas for expressions of church that i think would work with the current lifestyles. But im not going to go into that in this blog. Church planting is different for every plant, what works in one area will probably not work in another. A church plant is unique to the environment it is immersed in. Its something i'll come back to writing about at another time.

After the final worship, as usual theres the usual coffee and chatting, and at this time i got caught by Carol (Mrs DC) , who wanted to know where i'd been and what i thought about it all. This was the question i was dreading...but expecting...So i told her what seminars i had been to. After i had told her, she said that she thought that there was so much that the youth in the army could do and that there is alot of potential there that if its not grasped the army will miss out. I think she was basically telling me (and Michelle who was talking to her at the same time) to go for it. A little later on Carol told me that she wouldnt be surprised if she got told that i had applied for essential, and that even if im not going to do anything within the army after the year, that it opens your eyes and builds your faith immensely.

So i guess avoiding the issue isnt going to work much longer, i've been told enough times during the 6 hours or so in govan that essential is where im meant to head. Avoidance for one more year...i'll finish my degree..and if in 6 months i still feel the same way....the applications going in.

Book Tagging

2007-05-21T09:12:00.000Z

Laura caught me!
grr these are questions i shouldn't be asked...cause i own too many books.

How many books do you own?

I lost count at 200
Other people buy clothes and shoes....I buy books :)

What was the last book you read?

"The Reality Dysfunction" Peter F. Hamilton.

What book are you presently reading?

Well currently I'm reading a few books.
"The Historian" by Elizabeth Kostova,
"The Teeth of the Tiger" by Tom Clancy and
I'm re-reading "The Dream Merchant" by Isabella Hoving.

5 books that mean a lot to me are...

(No particular order)

The Bible - Timothy in particular (bet you're all surprised)
The Lord of the Rings trilogy (I'm cheating I'm putting 3 books in as one :P)
The Chronicles of Narnia (cheating again)
Malorie Blackman - Noughts and Crosses
Harry Potter - these are the first books I got obsessive over.
I can't only choose 5...I choose 10
Terry Pratchet - The Thief Of Time, The Truth
The Cross and the Switchblade - David Wilkerson
You're Grounded for Life and 49 other crazy things Parents say - Joey O'Conner
Too Busy Not to Pray - Bill Hybels
The Case for a Creator - Lee Strobels

If I'm not on the computer I'm generally reading, its my escape from everything.
Over the past few years there have been times in my life where things have gotten too much for me to cope, and when this happens I immersed myself in the world of a book.
The books i have said mean alot to me are books that i have immersed myself in to forget about everything (with the exception of The Cross and the Switchblade, Too Busy Not to Pray, and You're grounded for Life).

Books

2007-05-17T13:16:00.000Z

I have this nasty habit of buying books. In itself it doesn't sound too bad, but when you start buying at least 1 book a week, it starts to drain your bank fairly quickly.
I've re-discovered a way to feed my bookworm habit. Charity Shops!
I went and bought 4 books today during 'lunchtime' today. And the total cost was less than i usually pay for one book. :)
One of the books i bought today was 'All the tales from the Ark' by Avril Rowlands.

The Blurb on the back says this:

"Mr Noah could not sleep. So he lay in bed, listening to the snuffles and grunts of the animals, and he talked to God.
'Listen, God, it's not too late. You need a lion-tamer for this job, or a big game hunter, or a zoo keeper. And I'm scared of spiders and we've got two on board.'

Spiders aren't Mr Noah's only problem. The lion wants to be in charge, the camels have got the hump and then the animals threaten to revolt...! "

One of the first words in my head was "GENIUS", I've never heard of this book before, or the author, but if this book turns out to be a s good as it seems, I'll be keeping an eye out for her other books.

For the more nosey ones amongst you, the other books i got are : Tom Clancy - The Teeth of the Tiger, Tom Clancy - Hunt for Red October, and Craig Russell - Blood Eagle.

signing off

Bill Bailey

2007-05-03T14:52:00.000Z

Whose up for it?
http://www.secc.co.uk/whatson/index.cfm?inc_dsp=view&eventRef=054B762C-508B-E9FB-988BA389312CFCF4

Friday - in pictures

2007-04-21T19:59:00.000Z

So I decided to catalog my day (completely) in pictures....heres the results (i'll put in captions just incase you dont understand some of it.

(usual morning routine....wake up...shower..hair dry)

(breakfast...extra time = play guitar...leave 7:20ish)

(a few views of my daily journey)

(uni...studying for exam in an hour)

(day out ... its dry so we went to a park)

(student union!! )

(band practise....dad = bandmaster...my bass..the church hall)

(home...bethany playing piano...mum and dad)

So that was a day in the life of me...in pictures.
Not my usual day...but not completely out of the ordinary either.

Wow

2007-04-17T16:49:00.000Z

Look what i saw this morning at half 7(ish)...if it hadn't stoped raining for a minuite or so at that moment i wouldnt have noticed

(incase you dont know what it is, each little black thing, is a bird)

2007-03-25T18:26:00.000Z

I love this song, its called Back to you, and its by a band called fighting instinct.
Its a song that is close to my heart at the moment, so i thought i'd share it with you.
I've included the lyrics because the video isnt the best.

Fighting Instinct - Back To You

I just want to find my way back to You
Where love is strong and feels brand new

I’m sitting here far away from You
I’ve tried so hard to know what I should do
It’s all been tried and all has failed
To bring me back to where I once live

Chorus
I just want to find my way back to You
Where love is strong and feels brand new

I’m so tired, I can’t fight anymore
I feel as though I’ve turned and shut my own door
I’ve prayed so hard, hoping that You care
But then I turn and find You are there

I find You are there

Well, I’ve been to this place before
Out on this edge so afraid to look down
Broken down and torn, I’ll find my way back to You

2007-03-23T23:11:00.000Z

Over the past wee while I have noticed how much I actually do for friends. For no particular reason...but I dunno what I'd do without them.
I've had many conversations with people over the past few weeks just about random crap thats happening in peoples lives. I never really feel its my place to give advice, but from experience just talking to someone about anything helps. So I'm happy to be a listening ear.
But while doing this, alot of random stuff has been building up in my head, and cause I always put my friends first, anything in my head/life I have pushed out the way so I can try and help them.

2007-03-23T23:10:00.000Z

Wow I havent posted anything in AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEESSSS!!!!!

Lent

2007-02-09T13:50:00.000Z

Why do we always give something up for Lent?
I know why we do..but why is it always chocolate or coffee or something that after a while you get used to living without, something that we can find a substitute for.

Last year I gave up chocolate, and I got that used to it that i still dont eat it much.
So if lent has the ability to make something 'stick' in your life (even if its an absence of something) why isnt it put to good use.

What I mean is instead of giving up chocolate or Irn-Bru or something why don't we give up an hour of our time each day, and in that hour do something 'nice', a selfless good deed. Give up an huor to help your gran out around the house, to help a friend wtith homework, or even (if your brave enough) tidy up your neighbourhood park.

Then instead of getting used to having no chocolate..or whatever..we'll be used to doing a good deed everyday and this would make the 'world' a nicer place to live.

its just a thought!

Momentus occasion!

2007-01-17T17:03:00.000Z

last piece of coursework this term finished and handed in.
Wooh!! *funky chicken*
only 1 exam to go.

14 years

2007-01-15T11:59:00.000Z

wow 14 years passes really quickly.
Today is the 14th aniversary of my Aunts death.
I was only 5 when she died but hey i still remember her.

2007-01-13T20:49:00.000Z

I'm more of a listening person than a talking person, because for me talking is a big deal.
One of the reasons (if not the only reason) for this is that I have a stutter. Although it is generally not severe, when I am nervous or anxious in any way, it gets alot worse (I can rarely complete a sentence). I get extremely self-conscious about this, and angry at myself when I can't get the words out that I want to.
Because of this it takes alot of trust on my part to get talking to someone, and I don't mean chatting I mean really talking. Thankfully there are certain members of my (wide) 'friendship circle' that I trust implicitly. I could tell them anything, maybe not face-to-face but through an e-mail or a msn conversation. Even though most of them aren't (I hate this word, its not actually what I mean) "religious", I could still tell them anything, no matter how silly or stupid, and they wouldn't laugh in my face.
When I am around anyone in this group, for some reason my stutter subsides, its still there, but its not as noticeable (well not as big a deal to me). For this I want to thank them, they don't know what they do or how much of a confidence boost this has given me.
I know I've done alot of this while blogging, but my friends mean everything to me.
I'm not going to list these people, but hopefully they know who they are.

Blessings
Laura (LJ)

2007-01-10T20:27:00.001Z

Another “Wicked” blog here (I said I was slightly obsessed!) yeah so, this is another one of the songs from “Wicked”, its called ‘Dancing Through Life’. Its one of my favorite songs at the moment, just because its got so many phrases in it that are just fab (in my eyes). For instance “Those who don't try
Never look foolish” which is true although I wouldn’t live my life by it.

Dancing Through Life
The trouble with school is
They always try to teach the wrong lesson
Believe me, I've been kicked out
Of enough of them to know
They want you to become less callow
Less shallow
But I say: why invite stress in?
Stop studying strife
And learn to live "the unexamined life":

Dancing through life
Skimming the surface
Gliding where turf is smooth
Life's more painless
For the brainless
Why think too hard?
When it's so soothing
Dancing through life
No need to tough it
When you can sluff it off as I do
Nothing matters
But knowing nothing matters
It's just life
So keep dancing through

Dancing through life
Swaying and sweeping
And always keeping cool
Life is fraught-less
When you're thoughtless
Those who don't try
Never look foolish
Dancing through life
Mindless and careless
Make sure you're where less
Trouble is rife
Woes are fleeting
Blows are glancing
When you're dancing
Through life

especially for my friends

2007-01-07T20:12:00.000Z

One of the biggest things in my life is music, I’ve been brought up in a musical household, and music more than anything else influences me.
One of the other most important things in my life, more than music (*Shock Horror*) is my friends. I’d do anything for you. You lot know who you are.
Recently I’ve come across a musical called “Wicked” and have become slightly obsessed. There is a song in this musical called “For Good” and it speaks of how you are ‘changed’ by knowing your friends. If you didn’t have the friends you’ve had or have you would be a different person. There’s no guarantee that you’ve ‘been changed for the better’ but if you’ve had or have good friends, worthy friends you have more than likely ‘been changed for the better’.
This is a message to my friends, all of them, past and present, I’m thankful that you’ve been a part of my life.
Thanks.

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you:

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend:

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a sky bird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you:
I have been changed for good.

Again, Thanks, for everything
God Bless

Wow

2006-12-25T16:57:00.000Z

Time: Christmas eve/Christmas Morning 1am
Location: The Hill in my village
The Event: I SAW DEER!!!
The Result: Santa must exist!

evening at the hilton (ooh fancy)

2006-12-20T23:22:00.000Z

Its lynseys birthday today (happy birthday toooo yooouu) and we went to the Hilton hotel in Glasgow for dinner;

and some things happened that i just had to blog.

First of all we were led to our table by "Lazerous"
we were served by "Sarah" (funky irish lass)
Lynsey got sung "happy Birthday" to her by "Jesus" and "Sarah"
also just to round it off, she was sitting next to "Bethany".

hehe biblical references, i love them, and at Christmas aswell.

thats all folks
God bless

Confession time

2006-12-12T22:12:00.000Z

i have to apologise but i've gone all boy bandy.
blame take that!
i'm not too excited about their new song,patience, but having them back on the scene, ive been listening to the 2vintage songs", like babe, pray, sure,everything changes, relight my fire,could it be magic.
But my favourite has to be Never Forget:

2006-11-30T09:18:00.000Z

HERO By: Superchick
No one sits with him, he doesn’t fit in,
But we feel like we do when we make fun of him,
'Cause you want to belong, do you go along?
'Cause his pain is the price paid for you to belong
It’s not like you hate him or want him to die,
But maybe he goes home and thinks suicide,
Or he comes back to school with a gun at his side,
Any kindness from you might have saved his life...

TAG: Heroes are made when you make a choice...
CHORUS:
You could be a hero,
Heroes do what’s right,
You could be a hero,
You might save a life,
You could be a hero, you could join the fight,
For what’s right, for what’s right, for what’s right...

No one talks to her, she feels so alone,
She’s in too much pain to survive on her own,
The hurt she can’t handle overflows to a knife,
She writes on her arm, wants to give up her life,
Each day she goes on is a day that she’s brave,
Fighting the lie that giving up is the way,
Each moment of courage her own life she saves,
When she throws the pills out a hero is made...

TAG/CHORUS

No one talks to him about how he lives,
He thinks that the choices he makes are just his,
Doesn’t know he’s a leader with the way he behaves,
And others will follow the choices he’s made,
He lives on the edge, he’s old enough to decide,
His brother who wants to be him is just nine,
He can do what he wants because it’s his right,
The choices he makes change a nine-year-old's life...

TAG/CHORUS

BRIDGE:
Little Mikey D was the one in class
Who every day got brutally harassed,
This went on for years until he decided
That never again would he shed another tear,
So he walked through the door,
Grabbed the .44 out of his father’s dresser drawer,
And said, "I can’t take life no more!"
And like that, life can be lost,
But this ain’t even about that,
All of us just sat back and watched it happen,
Thinkin', "It’s not my responsibility
To solve a problem that isn’t even about me,"
This is our problem,
This is just one of them daily scenarios
In which we choose to close our eyes,
Instead of doing the right thing,
If we make a choice
To be the voice
For those who won’t speak up for themselves,
How many lives would be saved, changed, rearranged?
Now it’s our time to pick a side,
So don’t keep walking by, not wanting to intervene,
'Cause you just wanna exist and never be seen,
So let’s wake up,
Change the world,
Our time is now...

You could be a hero - Heroes do what’s right
You could be a hero - you might save a life
You could be a hero - you could join the fight
For what’s right, for what’s ri-ight...

Kirstin!!!

2006-11-29T14:15:00.000Z

Hold up, Wait a minute......Everybody dance now!!

yeah so if kirstin says at anytime "hold up wait a minute" ive to sing/say "everybody dance now!" yeah the things that start while bored in uni!

yo-yo

2006-11-29T10:36:00.001Z

how much fun can you have with a yo-yo....just take it into uni!

Essential

2006-11-29T02:35:00.000Z

yeah so going on this essential course has been on my mind for ages.
Its something that i've wanted to do for ages, and before essential it was The Timothy Course, which is really what essential is replacing. The only thing stopping me was how much it cost, and now its essentially free (no pun intended). Now the only thing stopping me is that i'm halfway through my uni course.
So my options are
1. take a year out of uni and do essential.
2. do essential between 3rd year and (honours possibly).
3. do essential after completing uni.
4. after a year of work (after uni).
5. dont do essential.
I know there will always be reasons for me not to do it, but i think that there will also always be something in the back of my head telling me to do it.....anyone got any ideas?

blogger has been a pain...

2006-11-27T23:03:00.000Z

and said that me old blog no longer exists, however if u want to in, read my old one go to http://i-canarmy.blogspot.com.
i'll try to update this more than i did my old one.